It wasn't JUST a slap!!!

2020 promises to be a year of many FIRSTS!

For the first time last night, I decided I wanted to watch a movie without my husband tagging along. You see, all along I’ve wanted him to join me for movies. Most often I would miss out on the movies I wanted to see, because he didn’t like the subject, or the director, or the ideology, or the star. I don’t blame him. He had his reasons; genuine or not. I regretfully tagged along and gave the movies a skip. Not yesterday though!!!

I wanted to see Thappad and decided I would see it, even if I had to watch it all alone. Just as I logged into bookmyshow and selected my seat, I thought id ask my girlfriends if they wanted to tag along; and they did. Yehhh

So, five of us, hurried through our chores, cooked dinner and kept everything ready for our families and then dolled up and went for the movie.

Then as five of us sat and watched the movie, we went through an internal conflict. We retrospected, we introspected,  we responded, we sobbed, we empathized with the protagonist, and we sympathized with our own selves. Don’t get me wrong. We come from happy families, we come from happy marriages, we love our children, we love our husbands.

But for the umpteenth time I sat there wondering ‘WHY’, ‘why do we women choose to keep quiet, why do we accept this, why do we brush it under  the carpet, why do we tell our daughters that its ok, why do we silently watch other women fight their battles, why do we ignore a mans actions, why do we forgive him and tell others to forgive him, why do we advise women to forgive and move on! Why, Why, Why?

Thappad is a movie that questions all the teachings that mothers teach their daughters. This is a movie that questions age old patriarchal norms. It questions a woman’s self-worth.

Mind you, the husband loves his wife, the in-laws adore their daughter-in-law, the parents love their daughter and the brother loves his sister. Yet, when it came to calling out the wrong from the right; each one of them kept silent and then asked the wife to forgive and move on. WHY?

I recommend the movie to everyone and also ask them to watch it with their entire families and make a promise to fix things before it is too late.

The why of Networking

When you are an entrepreneur slogging hard to make your business a success, you need to work smart and use all the possible tools in hand. This includes joining networks, attending meets, interacting, collaborating, actively participating, proposing initiatives et al. While all this might seem like too much work, considering how busy you already are and how pressed for time; this is a much needed task.

You want to know why? Then go through the points below and if these resonate with you and make sense, then put them to use and see how your business grows.

Be like a bee

A bee never just sits on one flower always. It goes from flower to flower collecting honey. As it collects honey it also gives back something to the flower. A pollen here, a pollen there and soon you have a garden full of beautiful flowers of different hues. Similarly, when you network you take with you contacts that you already have; you make new contacts, you also get the opportunity to connect with the contacts of the people you network with. Imagine this A meets B, B introduces A to C, C introduces A and B to D..... so on and so forth. Isn’t this a win win situation?

Be a Student

While you network, you come across all kinds of people. Some great successes at their business, some failures at all ventures, some learners, some preachers, some teachers, some experienced veterans! These are your teachers! If you pay close attention, you will learn so much in a single night’s interaction. If you are a good learner, you might even get an opportunity to meet the best of the best personally and take private tuition from them. The possibilities are endless. Networking will always ... repeat always .. give you take always.

Be a sponge

Observe and absorb as much as possible. You will gain insight into so many market trends just by paying attention. You don’t need to necessarily know everything there is to know about the industry when you start off, but believe me, you will be a lot richer in terms of industry knowledge by the end of a meet.

Take away

The most important take away of Networking are the referrals. Most referrals referred at networking meets are of high quality and are genuinely genuine. When a person refers someone to someone, his reputation is also at stake here. So he will make sure that he passes on good referrals. How you convert the referrals is up to you!

Participate

Don’t just be a face in the crowd when you attend networking events. Straighten your shoulders, put on your best smile and have a conversation with people. You are here not for the free coffee or snacks, you are here to meet, interact and gain some. Unless you talk about yourself and your business, no one will know you. 

You need to make your presence felt for people to remember you and thus want to stay in touch with you.

In all, Networking is not just about dressing up and going into a room full of entrepreneurs. It is about letting the world know that you too are an entrepreneur and that you too are here to profit as much to teach and learn.

                                                                                                                                              

The wish to be a MOTHER

Saw an advt in the news papers this morning (July 30, 2015. Mumbai Mirror. Page 5). While the gist of the matter gave me heart, what bothered me were the specifications! We use such discretion while selecting marriage partners and now are doing so for progeny as well!  

Yes, being sure about what you get is good, but such classifications as “fair or wheatish complexion”! What is that for? Shouldn't the requirement be for a “strong, healthy, ailment free, living a good and clean lifestyle, intelligent donor?

It takes two sets of people for a baby to be born. What guarantee that the receiver is as fair or as wheatish as the donor? What if the receiver is dark and the chromosomes are dominant and therefore the foetus takes on the dominant characteristics? Will the resulting baby be disowned because he or she is dark?

Such advts make my blood boil.

Like I said before the fact that people are advertising openly for egg donors is a sign that now people are more aware, knowledgeable and are more willing to for in for IVF. They are no longer seeking ONLY divine intervention, Babaji ki dua or jadibuti ka chamatkar!   

I guess there is still a long way to go before we accept colour, creed and class. However, till we get there, let me rejoice in the fact that we have atleast woken up. HALLELUJAH! 

Worse than an ANIMAL - He is condemned!!!

Mornings are more often than not spoiled after going through the morning news papers! Today morning was no different and yet I closed the paper with a sickening feeling in my heart. The headlines “SC to hear if Navy right in sacking staffer for incest” http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/SC-to-hear-if-Navy-right-in-sacking-staffer-for-incest/articleshow/47919111.cms made me wonder. Are they ACTUALLY wasting time questioning the right of the Navy to sack this sicko or are they condemning the INCEST!!!!

The case in question is about the need for the Supreme Court to examine a critically sensitive issue wherein they want to check if a Navy officer can be dismissed from service for having consensual sexual relations with his daughter! What is it that I’m missing here? 

For me its a clear cut case of RAPE! Rape of a young girl, rape of trust, rape of faith, rape of the relationship that fathers and daughters share, rape of justice, rape of integrity, rape of dignity, rape of everything that glorifies fathers!

Why then is there a need to even get into any other argument?

The man is guilty in the sorrowful eyes of the girl, in the eyes of the Armed Forces Tribunal, in the eyes of the Navy, and most importantly in the eyes of GOD! There SHOULD be no need for appeal.

He has disrespected his role as a father, he has disrespected his daughter, he has disrespected the relationship, he has disrespected the sanctity of the father daughter bond, he has disrespected common sense and intelligence. He has no right to appeal.

He is condemned!!! MAY GOD NEVER SAVE HIM!!! AMEN!!!

Seeking Happily Ever After

Offlate Ive been thinking about how wishes for the newly wedded need to undergo a change. Gone are the days of “Love laughter and happily ever after”, “Wishing you happiness always”, “Congratulations on your wedding”, etc etc.

Those wishes were meant for couples who stood by each other through thick and thin, through sickness and health, through good times and bad, through children and grandchildren and for marriages that celebrated their 50^th year with much pomp and show. 

These were couples who had their differences, sometimes didn’t meet eye-to-eye on all issues, who argued and maybe shut doors with a bang at times! But these were also couples who stuck together (willingly or otherwise) for the sake of their children and for peace in the family and because they didn’t want to be seen as failures.

These days it’s about “MY space”, “MY freedom”, “MY identity”, “ME”, “ME”, “ME”! There is nothing wrong with that. Having and knowing your selfworth is very important, but this feeling of selfworth is also true for the partner.  

Today marriages are lavish affairs, each wedding outdoing the other in terms of location, theme, clothes, invitations, menu, shor sharaba, naach gana! However how many of us from my generation and the one following us can boast of a 15^th wedding anniversary .. and hopefully a 25^th and thereafter a 50th!!!

I believe that wishes now need to undego a change. We must now wish the newly wedded “A happy marriage where you respect each other”, “A blissful life where you live, share, care with each other and love eachother”, and yes “A graceful book (Note – not chapter) where you write memoires of love, respect and care”.

Our wedding vows need more words like Respect, Monogamy, Care, Cherish, RESPONSIBLE Freedom and LOVE.

And after all of this, if marriages still don’t work out.... You stop, introspect, take a deep breath and start all over again with the blessings of your loved ones. AMEN     

An expo to boost The Green movement

 October 25th, 2012 - 2 years, 224 days ago  Vandana 

Building Technology, Construction materials/Chemicals | Viewed times | No Comments

In a bid to provide momentum to the Green Construction movement in India, UBM India has announced EcoBuild India 2013 – an exhibition and conference on sustainable design, construction and the built environment. Sanjeev Khaira, Managing Director, UBM India speaks to Vandana Joshil about the expo and the company’s future plans.

With the booming construction industry in India, it is the right time for an expo like Ecobuild which focuses on innovation in design and low carbon technologies. How have you planned the expo and what type of exhibitors are you expecting?

Ecobuild is the world’s largest exhibition dedicated to the future of sustainable building design, construction and the built environment. Launched in 2004, Ecobuild in the UK is held annually in March at London’s ExCeL and is attended by the most influential individuals and organisations from the design and construction sector. To provide a platform for the sustainable built environment in Asia, Ecobuild China was successfully launched in April 2012, and now in 2013, we will introduce Ecobuild India.

We feel the time is right to bring the event to the Indian market, as always, we took the decision to launch following significant research and consultation with key stakeholders in the sector. It is clear that that the construction sector in India is set for unprecedented growth. The industry is currently worth more than US$ 300 billion, this is estimated to increase to US$ 500 billion by 2015. At present there are nearly one billion square feet of projects that are registered for LEED in India, with nearly 1500 projects in the pipeline trying to get LEED rating. Achieving this rating is only possible if every aspect of the building conforms to the required sustainability standards.

At a macro level, 380 million people live in cities with inadequate urban infrastructure. This figure is anticipated to rise by 60% by 2030. Fifty three cities in India have a population of over one million and by 2030 this is expected to rise to sixty eight. The country is struggling to meet the growing demand for critical resources and also needs to manage rising energy costs. All these conditions convinced us the we need launch Ecobuild India, next April, in Mumbai.

Sustainability in construction is a very vast area. Are you going to touch on all the verticals of green construction?

We are looking at several hundred companies to take part in the first edition. The Expo will cover over 7000-8000 metres and will target a B2B audience. The exhibition will showcase all aspects of a sustainable building – from renewable energy generation, water management, building services, systems control, finished products – with timber sourced from sustainable sources rather than from the rainforest, external building systems- cladding and self cleaning glass.

Visitors will be architects, specifiers, developers, construction technicians, builders, manufacturers and distributers – we are targeting people who make significant purchases and handle large scale implementations. Often people come to an exhibition to get an update on the latest technology in the market, and we expect many of our exhibitors to launch their latest products at the expo – particularly the international exhibitors. Ecobuild already has a relationship with international players in the UK and China, and they have shown a positive response to the Indian market and want to work with us here.

What will be the focus of the technical seminars?

We have designed a comprehensive content programme based on two broad themes – Beyond the Built Environment – achieving India’s Sustainable future and the second is Making Sustainable Design Construction happen. This will not only include a lot of theory but will also talk about what actually happens on the ground, in a commercial context. For instance some solutions that work in other parts of the world might not actually work in India because of the climatic conditions etc. There will also be a comprehensive seminar programme that will be technical and have an educational focus. I am really excited about the Experience Zone where companies will showcase actual products. In this zone, we will recreate parts of an actual office space to give a complete understanding of what’s actually involved in the layout and mechanics of an installed system.

There will be a combination of Indian and International experts, thought leaders in and outside the industry. Also, there will be developers, architects, environmentalists and technical people. We aim to have a mixed broad base of speakers so that we have interesting and informative sessions that provoke discussion and dialogue.

What are UBM’s plan for the future and the areas it wants to explore as India needs to be introduced to many more advanced technologies?

UBM India has grown considerably since we set up in India in 2006. We now annually deliver 25 exhibitions, over 80 conferences and another 20 round table discussions/awards type events. We organise 125 events in all, and have four magazines and eight web portals. Essentially, we bring buyers and sellers together and we collect communities around areas of interest. Globally, we operate in 40 different verticals; and currently in India we are operating in 18, so we see plenty of opportunity to look at other markets and expand the number of verticals in which we operate. We are also looking at expanding our profile within the verticals we are currently in.

- See more at: http://buildotechindia.com/an_expo_to_boost_the_green_movement/#sthash.8AO4GGbK.dpuf

The Sreepada Dance Kalari – Coming together of Architecture & Dance

 November 29th, 2012 - 2 years, 189 days ago  Vandana 

Projects | Viewed times | No Comments

When classical dancer Methil Devika wanted to build a dance academy that would be a space not just for Learning Dance – but also be thriving and a common space for people from the arts background and allied fields, Architect Vinod Kumar M M of Dd Architects from Kerala was ecstatic. From this combination of the passion for dance and the relationship between Architecture and dance was born the Sreepada Dance Kalari in Ramanathapuram, Palakkad.

Methil Devika wanted a space that would give the necessary creative energy to conceive new dance productions and would also pay reverence to the traditional texts of Natyasastra. The space would have to be a thriving and common platform for artists. As an architect, Vinod has always been excited about the relation between Architecture and dance. For him – just like an architect crafts a building with forms and materials, the dancer creates space through his/her body/mudras. The relation between the human body and the enclosed space has been a topic of interest and this project provided an opportunity to practice the ideas that he had nurtured in his mind.

For him, architectural structures are living spaces if done with interest and the right attitude. The architectural team treated the Sreepada Dance Kalari structure with utmost respect. They played music during the foundation stone laying and later during the inauguration, the teacher and her students performed with the sun’s rays falling on them through the central skylight. That ceremony was a celebration of form, structure and life all around – something that is often missed or forgotten in the architecture of today.The structure which was completed in 2011 took over 10 months to complete and gave the design team the confidence that even within tight budgets, interesting, innovative structures could be created.

The traditional and the contemporary blissfully coexist in this pristine, purpose-built space, which also adheres to time-honoured norms of the Natyasastra. – Methil Devika

As per the Indian concept, a temple is considered to be living and representing the Human body. The designs of all Koothambalams of Kerala temples are based on these concepts and are constructed according to the guidelines given in the Nātyasāstra of Bharata Muni. Sreepada is an attempt in the modern times to create such a contemporary temple for the practice of Dance.

Since the Dancer through his/her body relates with the audience and outer space, care has been taken to design an eco friendly structure where one can relate with the Sun, rain and the breeze within the kalari.

Thus on a normal day with the movement of the Sun, changing moods are created with the changing patterns of light and shade within the space. With music and dances performances added, the space comes alive.

The way an architect crafts a building with forms and materials, the dancer, creates space through mudras. The relation between the human body and the enclosed space has been an interesting topic for me. – Vinod Kumar

During the rains the structure takes on a life of its own with the sound and smells of the rains in the courtyard. The design element is seen even in the chilankas (ghungroos) that the team used for detailing in the doors and also in the general branding/signage and the lighting fixtures.

The entry at the road level is marked with a small entrance gate which has stone lamps, as seen at temple entrances. A changing room was made near the entry from where the site descends down to the dance hall. Within that is a small stage for practice which actually is the foundation of an old house which was on site. The natural levels were kept as they were and thus from the road level till the paddy fields behind the dance hall, it is a natural descend. The architectural team retained/strengthened the foundation, so that it could be a space for having future additions.

As one enters the structure, there is a small entry court filled with pebbles and then a practice hall. There is a door in the east which has a symbolic ‘sreepada’ in brass on the floor. Towards the south of the structure is a small open space for students to relax after practice sessions. Flower bearing trees which add fragrance to the dancing space have been planted in the open space.

Daylighting is mostly done through three small courtyards within the hall and also through a central skylight. This creates interesting changing patterns of light and shade throughout the day.

As the levels of the site which follow the natural flow of water are maintained, there is a natural stepwise levelling from the road to the paddy field even after the project got completed. There is a level difference of around 150cms from north to south. The architect has used basic sustainable materials like brick, stone, bamboo and terracotta tiles for construction. Treated bamboo which were sourced from Wayanad in Kerala were used for jallis while stone and bricks were sourced locally. Terracotta, both flooring and roof tiles were sourced from nearby districts.

Most of the work has been done through local workers. Stone craftsmen who did the Dharmachakra carving in the entrance lintel were brought from Tamilnadu. Local fabricators made the roof structure and proved to be efficient and accurate in their works. The Kerala mural paintings on all the four sides were made as per the Natyasastra texts and were made by a young mural artist called Prabeesh. Infact ever since its formation in 2002, Dd Architects has been striving to develop a contemporary vocabulary suited for the Kerala context inspired from the rich tradition. The firm also work towards the revival of the local craft related to the building industry.

Since the site is in two levels – the entry at the road level and the Kalari at the paddy field level there were immense possibilities for landscaping. Shade grass, pebbles for courts, stone paths, fragrant flowering trees have been used throughout the landscape to give the site a very ‘close to nature’ feel. Most of the existing trees were retained and maintained. The project has the distinction of being awarded the Kerala State Gold Leaf award by the Kerala chapter of Indian Institute of Architects.

Methil Devika is a recipient of the National honours like Ustad Bismillah Khan Yuva Puraskar 2007 from the Kendra Sangeet Natak Akademy and the Devadasi National Award from the Government of Orissa 2010 for her proficiency in the performance and academic practice of Mohiniyattam.

http://buildotechindia.com/the_sreepada_dance_kalari_coming_together_of_architecture_and_dance/